[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]One of the most in-demand skills in the professional and/or social spheres today is to know how to control the emotions and thoughts that our minds generate in response to a situation.

Emotional Regulation

Emotional regulation or control is the ability to manage emotions appropriately. It consists of directing and managing emotions—both positive and negative—effectively.

The Essential Component of Emotional Control is Cognitive

The essential component of emotional regulation is of a cognitive nature, since this is the way we interpret the concrete situations that condition emotional reactions. For example, we might interpret a negative comment someone makes about us as offensive, which would cause an emotional reaction of anger or dislike towards that person. On the other hand, it can be interpreted as having a positive or constructive intention behind it, which would mean that there would be no hard feelings. This is why understanding our thoughts is an indispensable part of emotional regulation.

Bodily Control has an Impact on Emotional Regulation

The other basic component of emotional regulation is related to bodily control, since the intensity of the feelings we experience is closely related to physiological arousal. For this reason, muscular relaxation and breath control allow us to regulate and control our emotional reactions and their intensity.

How to Regulate Emotions

Therefore, regulating emotions implies:

[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row height=»small»][vc_column][vc_row_inner css=»%7B%22default%22%3A%7B%22padding-top%22%3A%2225px%22%2C%22padding-right%22%3A%225px%22%2C%22padding-bottom%22%3A%2225px%22%2C%22padding-left%22%3A%225px%22%2C%22background-color%22%3A%22%23eaeaea%22%7D%7D»][vc_column_inner][vc_column_text]

EMOTIONAL CONTROL

[/vc_column_text][vc_column_text]

Appropriately responding to the emotions we experience:
An essential element of emotional education

[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner css=»%7B%22default%22%3A%7B%22padding-top%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-right%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22padding-bottom%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-left%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22background-color%22%3A%22%23f4f4f4%22%7D%7D»][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]

Important components:

[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]

Techniques for emotional regulation:

[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row height=»small»][vc_column][us_image image=»2363″ size=»full» align=»center»][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row height=»small»][vc_column][vc_column_text]

Didactic Suggestions and Activities for Developing Emotional Regulation:

To first provide some context:

Automatic Thoughts:

Automatic thoughts are commonly related to intense emotional states (like anxiety, depression, anger or euphoria). They are differentiated from thoughts that tend to be rationalised through reflection and analysis and that can be carried out in emotional moments of calmness or tranquillity.

Common Automatic Thoughts and How to Avoid Them:

Cognitive distortions are different types of automatic thought that tend to be common and repetitive and produce distorted and irrational thoughts.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row height=»small»][vc_column][vc_row_inner css=»%7B%22default%22%3A%7B%22padding-top%22%3A%2225px%22%2C%22padding-right%22%3A%225px%22%2C%22padding-bottom%22%3A%2225px%22%2C%22padding-left%22%3A%225px%22%2C%22background-color%22%3A%22%23eaeaea%22%7D%7D»][vc_column_inner][vc_column_text]

Most Common Cognitive Distortions:

[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner css=»%7B%22default%22%3A%7B%22padding-top%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-right%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22padding-bottom%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-left%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22background-color%22%3A%22%23f4f4f4%22%7D%7D»][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]

Filtering

[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]This is selecting just one aspect of the situation and not noticing other aspects that contradict it. Usually we filter the negative and forget the positive, so the whole situation is interpreted according to that one selected detail. In an evaluation, for example, the one negative comment about our work can weigh down on us more than the positive comments can encourage us. To counteract this distortion it is good to ask, “Is this really the whole story?”[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner css=»%7B%22default%22%3A%7B%22padding-top%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-right%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22padding-bottom%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-left%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22background-color%22%3A%22%23eaeaea%22%7D%7D»][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]

Polarised Thinking

[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]This is valuing or perceiving events in an extreme way without taking into account the intermediate aspects. Things are valued as black or white: “If I am not perfect, I can be nothing but a failure.” In order to counteract this it is useful to ask whether there are degrees in between the two extremes.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner css=»%7B%22default%22%3A%7B%22padding-top%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-right%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22padding-bottom%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-left%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22background-color%22%3A%22%23f4f4f4%22%7D%7D»][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]

Overgeneralisation

[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]In this distortion a generalised conclusion is made about a simple incident or a single piece of evidence. Key words are: everything, nothing, never, always, everyone and no one. To counteract this we should ask, “How many times has this really happened? Has there been a different case that shows it is not always like this?”[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner css=»%7B%22default%22%3A%7B%22padding-top%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-right%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22padding-bottom%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-left%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22background-color%22%3A%22%23eaeaea%22%7D%7D»][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]

Thought Interpretation

[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]This is the tendency to interpret other people’s feelings and intentions without basis. Key phrases are “That is because…” and “That is due to…” To counteract it, it is useful to ask ourselves, “What proof do I have that supports this assumption? Can I do something to check if this supposition is true?”[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner css=»%7B%22default%22%3A%7B%22padding-top%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-right%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22padding-bottom%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-left%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22background-color%22%3A%22%23f4f4f4%22%7D%7D»][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]

Catastrophising

[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]This is putting oneself in the worst possible scenario without any evidence or reason to do so. The key phrase tends to be “What if…?” To counteract this it is good to stop anticipating, to focus on the present, and to consider possibilities. We can ask ourselves, “Have I thought this before? What really happened? What is the likelihood of this actually happening?”[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner css=»%7B%22default%22%3A%7B%22padding-top%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-right%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22padding-bottom%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-left%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22background-color%22%3A%22%23eaeaea%22%7D%7D»][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]

Personalisation

[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]This cognitive distortion tends to be accompanied by the tendency to compare oneself constantly with others. Key phrases are “They’re talking about me” or “I do this better [or worse] than they do.”[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner css=»%7B%22default%22%3A%7B%22padding-top%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-right%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22padding-bottom%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-left%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22background-color%22%3A%22%23f4f4f4%22%7D%7D»][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]

Fallacy of Control

[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]This is when the person either believes they are responsible for everything that happens around them, or, at the other extreme, believes they have absolutely no control over what happens in their life. Key phrases are “I can’t do anything about…”, “I will only feel good if…” and “It’s all my fault…”[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner css=»%7B%22default%22%3A%7B%22padding-top%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-right%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22padding-bottom%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-left%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22background-color%22%3A%22%23eaeaea%22%7D%7D»][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]

Fallacy of Fairness

[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]This consists of interpreting everything that does not coincide with wishes or personal expectations as unfair. Key phrases are “They have no right to…”, “It’s not fair that…”, “If it really…”, and “So…”[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner css=»%7B%22default%22%3A%7B%22padding-top%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-right%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22padding-bottom%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-left%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22background-color%22%3A%22%23f4f4f4%22%7D%7D»][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]

Emotional Reasoning

[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]This is about believing that emotions are directly related to the truth. Emotions are believed to be objective facts and not subjective interpretations.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner css=»%7B%22default%22%3A%7B%22padding-top%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-right%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22padding-bottom%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-left%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22background-color%22%3A%22%23eaeaea%22%7D%7D»][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]

Fallacy of Change

[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]The person tends to believe that in order for their needs to be met, it is others who must first change their behaviour. For example, in the case of a relationship problem, saying, “The problems will only be resolved if my partner changes”. To counteract this we should ask ourselves, “What can I test to prove to myself that the situation does not only depend on that one person? And even if it is not the case, is there something I can do about it?”[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner css=»%7B%22default%22%3A%7B%22padding-top%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-right%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22padding-bottom%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-left%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22background-color%22%3A%22%23f4f4f4%22%7D%7D»][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]

Global Labelling

[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]This consists of labelling ourselves or others, almost always using the verb to be. The key phrases are “I am a…”, “He is a…”, “They are…”[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner css=»%7B%22default%22%3A%7B%22padding-top%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-right%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22padding-bottom%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-left%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22background-color%22%3A%22%23eaeaea%22%7D%7D»][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]

Blaming

[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]This is attributing complete responsibility to ourselves or to others without a strong enough foundation and without taking into account other factors that contribute to the event. Another characteristic of blaming is that often it does not lead to the person changing their behaviour, but rather simply over-thinking bad things that have happened. In this case the key phrases are “…my fault” and “it’s …’s fault.” In order to counteract this, we can look for the causes of the problem without necessarily looking to find a guilty party.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner css=»%7B%22default%22%3A%7B%22padding-top%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-right%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22padding-bottom%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-left%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22background-color%22%3A%22%23f4f4f4%22%7D%7D»][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]

Should Statements

[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]A person with this distortion behaves according to demanding or inflexible rules about how things ought to happen. Any deviation from these rules or norms is considered intolerable and causes an emotional reaction. Thoughts focus on what should be instead of what is. The key phrases that indicate the presence of this distortion are “I should…”, “I shouldn’t…”, “I have to…”, “I don’t have to…”[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner css=»%7B%22default%22%3A%7B%22padding-top%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-right%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22padding-bottom%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-left%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22background-color%22%3A%22%23eaeaea%22%7D%7D»][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]

Fallacy of Reason

[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]This consists of the tendency to frequently test whether one’s point of view is correct and true when in disaccord with another person’s. The opinions of this kind of person rarely change because they find it difficult to accept new information. When facts do not match what they already believe, they ignore them.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner css=»%7B%22default%22%3A%7B%22padding-top%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-right%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22padding-bottom%22%3A%2215px%22%2C%22padding-left%22%3A%2210px%22%2C%22background-color%22%3A%22%23f4f4f4%22%7D%7D»][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]

Fallacy of Divine Reward

[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner width=»1/2″][vc_column_text]In this cognitive distortion the person tends not to look for a solution to difficulties or problems, supposing that the situation will either magically improve in the future or that something will “make up for” the current suffering. In this case the key phrases that indicate the distortion are something like, “Tomorrow I will be compensated,” and “Things will always get better in the future.”[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]

 

We’d love to know if you have learnt something new and if you have ever had to deal with your own automatic thoughts![/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]

Deja una respuesta

Tu dirección de correo electrónico no será publicada. Los campos obligatorios están marcados con *